


Decades

by jamesgatz1925



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alternate Universe, Breakup, College, Decades, Developing Relationship, Dirty Dancing, Established Relationship, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Back Together, Love, M/M, Secret Relationship, Smut, Song fic, Songfic, Stand-alone chapters, Teen AU, actual Sexy dancing, different decades, different time period, how do i even tag that?, i will add to the tags each chapter, not the movie, slight angst, teen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-03-27 22:34:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13890546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamesgatz1925/pseuds/jamesgatz1925
Summary: Rafael and Sonny as teens in different decades.(Each Chapter is standalone. It’s not like they’re aging.)





	1. Sh Boom (50’s)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G
> 
> No additional tags apply.

Sonny was distracted. Sonny didn’t notice that his shoes were two different colors, he didn’t notice he grabbed his math textbook instead of his history book, he didn’t notice his tie had a syrup stain on the bottom, or that his hair part was all over the place. Sonny was distracted.

Because Sonny was in love.

Sonny lived in a dreamlike state for most of the day and all of the night, thinking about the boy of his dreams and daydreams in many states. Holding Sonny’s hand, wearing Sonny’s letterman jacket proudly in the hallways, smiling at Sonny over a shared milkshake, dancing with Sonny at the weekly dance, playing Sonny’s favorite song on the jukebox at the diner...

Sonny was a mess.

And the boy didn’t even know his name, didn’t even know the young junior existed outside of school. And even then, Sonny only shared one class with him, so how much of Sonny did he actually notice? He certainly never paid Sonny any attention.

Sonny couldn’t help but smile at the thoughts, though. Face hidden in his locker as he looked for a pencil—which he didn’t notice was right there in front of him—he smiled widely at the thought of the boy doing literally anything. Of letting Sonny love him, letting Sonny be his one and only, letting Sonny into his heart.

“You’re thinking about Rafael again, aren’t you?”

Sonny jumped at the voice. “Gosh, make noise, will ya?” he asked his older sister Gina, a senior in the same class as the apple of Sonny’s eye. “And no, I was not...thinking about Rafael again...”

“That was a lie,” Gina said. Then, she nodded over Sonny’s shoulder. “Look-ie here.”

Sonny whipped his head around on time to see Rafael walking down the hall in his direction, black jacket slung over one shoulder and jeans rolled up on the bottom. He didn’t wear a tie like Sonny. Sometimes he wore a scarf. And he always wore worn tennis shoes instead of loafers like Sonny.

Sonny thought he was a square and Rafael was pretty much the coolest cat in the whole school. He didn’t wonder why Rafael didn’t know his name. The coolest thing about Sonny was the baseball pin on his letterman jacket.

Rafael walked near them. He smiled widely.

“Hey, Gina,” he said, stopping next to them, killing Sonny completely. He continued, “Did you still want some help on your science?”

“Yeah!” Gina replied, and Sonny was confused, but he stayed quiet, mostly because the close proximity to Rafael had his tongue tied.

Gina continued, “Do you think you can come to my house, say...tomorrow afternoon?”

Sonny almost threw up. Rafael. At his house. He wanted to punch Gina.

“Sure,” Rafael said, smiling. He looked at Sonny. Sonny wished he could slip through the floor. “And, uh, Sonny?”

Sonny nodded. “Y-yeah?”

“Will you be there?” Rafael asked.

“Uh...”

“He will be,” Gina supplied.

Rafael smiled again, still looking at Sonny. Sonny wanted to know why, but of course he didn’t ask. He just preened under Rafael’s gaze burning holes through his skin.

“I’d better split,” Rafael said. “See you tomorrow.”

Gina bid Rafael goodbye, but Sonny was unable to say anything.

Gina laughed at him as soon as Rafael was gone. “Boy, you are completely snowed.”

“Am not,” Sonny muttered, still staring after Rafael. Then the entire exchange caught up with him and he shook his head to clear his daydreams. “Wait, you don’t need help with science. You’re the best at science in the whole school.”

“I know. Someone needed to get the ball between you two rolling.”

“Wait, what?” Sonny asked, completely confused. “What do you mean—“

Gina just patted her little brother’s cheek. “You’re welcome.” She turned her back on Sonny and started down the hall.

Sonny quickly shut his locker and followed her. “What do you mean, ‘get the ball rolling’? Gina?”

Gina ignored him and kept walking, but Sonny knew she was laughing.

Either way, Sonny was caught in the thoughts of Rafael knowing his name, Rafael going to his house, and the possibility of the ball actually rolling between them. Maybe his dream was coming true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Sh Boom by The Chords (1954)


	2. Wouldn’t It Be Nice (60’s)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sonny and Rafael talk future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Rating: G  
> Additional tag: Established Relationship, Secret Relationship

Nothing was better than Sonny Carisi in his arms.

Except maybe Sonny Carisi himself.

Rafael was seventeen and had more feeling for Sonny than he’d ever had for anything in his life. As much as he loved school, loved his impending plans to begin Harvard, loves anything, he loved Sonny.

Sonny was smart, Sonny was funny, and Sonny was devastatingly handsome. He was popular and athletic, unlike Rafael, and he was well liked amongst all of his peers.

Rafael couldn’t believe Sonny was his. Rafael couldn’t believe Sonny was laying in his arms, picture perfect on a blanket in a sea of grass and flowers. It was their spot, deep in the woods, quiet between the trees, where they could bask under the sun and whisper words of love and admiration. Where they could live deeply away from the outside world of everyone who kept telling them they’re too young to be so in love.

“D’ya think we’ll have to hide here forever?” Sonny asked, voice slurred against Rafael’s chest and from the languid relaxation under the summer sun.

Rafael kissed the sweat shine on Sonny’s forehead.

“No,” Rafael said confidently. “Because one day we’ll be adults, and people will take us seriously.”

“Wouldn’t that be nice.”

Rafael nuzzled Sonny’s head. “One day, I’ll marry you.”

Sonny’s fingers traced lazily across Rafael’s clothed belly. “I wish we didn’t have to wait so long.”

“Mmm,” Rafael agreed. “We’ll wake up together, every morning. I’ll make you breakfast. And we’ll get to be together every day, and I’ll hold you all night long.”

Sonny sighed.

Rafael grew concerned. “What?” he asked, fearing he’d gone too far with the daydreaming.

“It’s just that...the more we talk about it, the harder it is to accept that we can’t do it right now.”

Rafael frowned. “I know. But I’m willing to wait. Are you?”

Sonny pressed a kiss to Rafael’s chest. “Yes,” he practically whispered.

Rafael’s smile slowly returned. Larger still when Sonny kissed up his chest to his jaw to his cheek.

It would be nice to be married here, now, as teens, in love, moving apart for college. But Rafael was willing to wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Wouldn’t It Be Nice by The Beach Boys (1966)


	3. Play That Funky Music (70’s)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sonny likes to dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Rating: G
> 
> Additional tags: There’s some bad language

Rafael happily leans back against Sonny’s headboard. It is a cold winter day in the city, but inside it is warm as could be. Sonny is stripped down bare but for a pair of jeans with rainbow stripes sewn around one thigh, his worn Nike’s tossed haphazardly into the room as soon as he entered. His hair is shaggy and wild, unkept because he was trying to grow it like John Travolta. Rafael doesn’t have the heart to tell him he just looked like a skinny bum.

Still, Sonny is adorable and Rafael can’t deny that. He looks cool in his flashy jeans, his neat shirts, his tattered Nike’s that were trashed from vigorous playing in the park every day.

Sonny was so young, it hits Rafael sometimes, because his innocence is still spent playing in the park in the afternoons, whereas other teens are usually caught smoking behind movie theaters when they sneak in to watch Star Wars for the hundredth time. Not Rafael and Sonny; Sonny plays and Rafael does homework until Sonny gets home and he can go over. Then, they spend the evening locked in Sonny’s room listening to music until his mother calls for dinner.

It’s sweet and relaxing, and Rafael lives for their afternoons.

Sonny loves music and he loves to dance. Any song, any band, any genre, Sonny saves his pennies until a new record comes out, then he rushes to the record shop two blocks away and purchases whatever is new. He doesn’t care what it is, he’ll listen to it. Sonny will listen to a record until he’s memorized every word to every song, then he’ll start all over.

Rafael loves to watch him get lost in the music. He loves to watch Sonny dance, watch him learn new songs on his guitar by ear, and loves to watch him contemplate what to play for Rafael next.

“This one,” Sonny continuously says, selecting a record, then sliding it back into place with the rest of his collection. “No, this one...no—“

Finally, he selects the one he always plays for Rafael, his favorite song.

Play That Funky Music by Wild Cherry. It is by far Sonny’s favorite. He loves it, and Rafael thinks he just loves it because he likes to believe he’s the white boy playing the funky music.

As tired as Rafael is of it, he doesn’t care how many times Sonny plays it, because Sonny’s face lights up when it begins. Sonny looks so happy, so excited each and every time it’s played, whether it’s on the radio, at a store, or at the arcade they frequent. Sonny loves it.

Bare chested and hidden in the warmth of his bedroom, Sonny’s arms flail and his hips sway to the song’s tight beat. Rafael remains leaned against the headboard just watching him.

“You’re going to ruin this disc, you know that?” Rafael asks.

“I’ll buy a new one,” Sonny replies, panting with exertion from dancing around.

Rafael loves watching him. His body is magnificent. The way he moves, the way his abs stretch and his hips roll...Rafael fucking loves it. He goes crazy for Sonny’s body. It drives him crazy that Sonny insists on stripping down to only jeans upon arriving home.

“Why don’t you dance with me?” Sonny asks.

Rafael’s eyes are glued to Sonny’s hips swiveling. “What?” he asks back.

Sonny holds out a hand. “Dance with me.”

Rafael chuckles. “Uh, no. This is your area of expertise, white boy.”

“Expertise? Hardly. Ya just gotta get down, feel the music...” Sonny seems to dance in slow motion, and Rafael’s jaw drops.

Sonny snickers. He steps over to Rafael and leans over him, and Rafael’s heart stops. Sonny is so close that his breath ghosts against Rafael’s lips and Rafael’s breathing pauses, too.

Sonny grins. “Cat got your tongue?”

Rafael slowly nods.

Sonny’s blue eyes sparkle beautifully this close. They’re always bright, always wide, but Rafael will never get over Sonny’s eyes shining more when they’re close enough to kiss. Even if he only gets to see the sparkle for a second before Sonny kisses him, he loves it each time.

“Want me to kiss you, Rafi?” Sonny asks.

“Yes, please.”

Sonny does so. Softly, devastatingly soft, like a cotton ball falling peacefully.

Rafael’s blood still spikes. Any little touch is enough, especially when he’s been watching Sonny get funky for an hour.

The song ends and another begins, but Rafael isn’t listening. He’s still staring into Sonny’s eyes, feeling Sonny’s weight almost pinning him to the bed with two hands on either side of Rafael’s hips.

“The song ended,” Rafael mutters.

To his disappointment, Sonny stands and steps back to the record player. Rafael watches his back as he waits for the next song Sonny will play to drive him crazy.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Play That Funky Music by Wild Cherry (1976)


	4. Talk Dirty to Me (80’s)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Rating: Explicit
> 
> Additional tags: Dirty talk, semi-public sex

Sonny was an anomaly.

He was sweet and funny, an athletic boy who didn’t wear band t-shirts or listen to Michael Jackson. He played baseball and only wore Nike’s when he was playing basketball. He liked to take his little sister to movies because he secretly liked the Disney movies. He went to church every Sunday. He was smart and devastatingly handsome; he never got in trouble for smoking behind the gym or sneaking out of class. He was good, pure, and not anything Rafael deserved.

But the mouth on him.

Less then a year younger than Rafael, the younger boy either watched too much television or had too vivid an imagination, because he was so good at saying the right thing to get Rafael wound up tight.

Usually in the back of Rafael’s mom’s Volvo, parked in the last row of the drive-in where it’s darkest and other couples just park to make out, Rafael gets Sonny laid flat on a not-so-soft blanket and Sonny, the innocent boy, lays half on top of him, one leg pushed between Rafael’s so he’s riding Rafael’s thigh.

“I wanna take your clothes off,” Sonny said, his tank-top he’d worn to baseball practice earlier that afternoon pushed halfway up his back so Rafael can scratch as Sonny licks at his throat. He continues, whispering the filthy words like prayers as Rafael holds his breath to hear better, “I wanna touch you while you scream my name...” He rolled his hips against Rafael’s thigh and Rafael’s brain short circuited.

His head dropped back with a thud against the metal bed of the car, and Sonny instantly latched to his neck.

Rafael had had sex a few times. It was 1987, all anyone was doing was having sex. But he had never been so turned on as he was in Sonny’s presence. Sonny didn’t even have to do anything, he just needed to smile at Rafael and Rafael would pulse in his jeans. All Rafael had to do was catch a glimpse of Sonny’s ass in his tight blue jeans and he’d lose his mind. No one, not even Phoebe Cates, got him going like Sonny did.

Sonny was hot and made Rafael even hotter.

Rafael squeezed his eyes shut and listened while Sonny spoke between sucking kisses along his jaw.

“I want you to push me on your bed, spread my legs and fuck me into the mattress—“

“Oh fuck,” Rafael mumbled, heart beating insanely fast. Where did Sonny learn this shit?

“You are so sexy,” Sonny said, sucking on Rafael’s earlobe, grinding his hips down.

Rafael thought he should probably stop, probably calm down, probably push a safe distance between himself and Sonny, but then Sonny whispered, “Do you want to come?”

“Yes please,” Rafael begged.

Sonny rotated his hips against Rafael’s thigh. “Mmm, fuck, ask again...”

“Please,” Rafael couldn’t help it. “Please, touch me, do anything—“

Sonny gave in. He reached down, palming Rafael through his jeans, stroked once, twice, and Rafael’s vision went white as he pulsed hot in his jeans, clutching Sonny tightly and feeling him rut smoothly against his thigh.

When Rafael came to, Sonny was gently kissing his cheeks and lips.

“I love you Rafi,” Sonny said, killing Rafael once again. If the filthy things Sonny was capable of saying got him going, whispered words of love really did.

“I love you too,” Rafael panted, stroking Sonny’s hair. “I love you so much.”

Sonny nuzzled his nose against Rafael’s. He gave Rafael the sweetest smile.

“I can’t wait until we can go all the way,” Sonny said. “When we can get in a bed and you can—“

Rafael had to stop him. “Baby, baby, Dios mio, you’re gonna kill me.”

Sonny laughed. Rafael loved that noise impossibly more.

Sonny rolled off Rafael, onto his back and stretched on the floor. Rafael watched him, loving the look of Sonny’s lithe body.

“What movie is this?” Sonny asked, sounding tired and satisfied.

Rafael saw Robin Wright enter the shot, and her paired with the setting made him remember it was The Princess Bride.

“The Princess Bride,” he answered.

“Mmm,” Sonny sighed, turning onto his side to settle against Rafael again. He lifted Rafael’s arm himself and snuggled under it. “I’ve seen it,” he sleepily said.

“What? Are you going on dates without me?”

Sonny kissed his chin. “Yeah, with my little sister.”

Rafael smiled. How sweet Sonny was. How cute and sweet and considerate. He kissed Sonny’s head.

Maybe Sonny would be able to watch the movie again and think of watching it with his little sister. However, for the rest of life, Rafael would only think of Sonny defiling him in the back of a Volvo. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Talk Dirty to Me by Poison (1987)


	5. Pony (90’s)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: I’ll say G because there’s no sex.
> 
> Additional tags: Sexy dancing, Developing Relationship?

Rafael didn’t usually take flyers from strangers inviting him to parties in random frat houses, but boy was he glad he did. Besides the cheap beer scent on old shag carpet, the terrible scene of stoners smoking in the house, and the really bad music, Rafael was having a great time.

Actually, Rafael was only enjoying the party for one reason. He was a sophomore and his name was Sonny.

Rafael had seen him around a few times, they must have had at least one mutual friend because Sonny seemed to show up at the same parties that he did pretty often. Sonny wasn’t in any of his classes, but he did know Sonny was a sophomore. He had overheard that once.

But basically, Rafael noticed him because he was insanely sexy. Sonny clearly loved to dance. He danced with anyone, everyone, to every song. Rafael was sure one or two frat guys a party realized they were attracted to men. Rafael had known a long time ago, and Sonny wasn’t the first, but damn did Rafael like the look of him.

Rafael never spoke to Sonny and he never danced with Sonny, no matter how many times a party Sonny glanced in his direction. Rafael watched and Sonny danced, and they’d lock eyes over shoulders as Sonny pulsed wildly against someone else.

Rafael thought maybe Sonny got off on being watched, on Rafael watching him. Maybe it was everyone, but Rafael never noticed Sonny staring intently at any other drunk college kids. Just him.

Rafael sipped at his gross beer as Sonny got down to the likes of Mariah Carey, Ricky Martin, even the Spice Girls, with a little bit of Beastie Boys and Nirvana thrown in. And god, Sonny did it well. He danced with boys, girls, everyone.

Rafael loved it.

His hands were itching to touch Sonny, his body was begging to feel Sonny’s against it. He wanted to grind against Sonny; he wanted to feel Sonny’s body against him.

The night progressed. Rafael had possibly too many shitty beers, but eventually Sonny’s eyes caught his and Rafael couldn’t stop himself from standing. He couldn’t stop himself from marching through the cleared living room floor that was a makeshift dance floor. He couldn’t stop himself from stepping right up to Sonny, who was dancing with a girl in Rafael’s class named Makayla, squaring his shoulders, lifting his chin, and smirking.

“Mind if I cut in?” he asked, voice as sultry as he could.

“Oh fuck, finally,” Makayla said, patting Rafael’s chest as she walked away.

Sonny grinned. “Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” Rafael replied, sliding close to Sonny.

“Like to dance?” Sonny asked.

Rafael shrugged. “I don’t really—“

Sonny grabbed his hands. “I’ll show you how.”

The song ended, but another began just as quickly. Rafael recognized it by the first note, as it was the most popular song being played everywhere at the moment—it had even already been played at this party—and it just so happened to be one of the sexiest songs ever sang: Pony by Genuwine.

Normally, Rafael would have made some excuse, cowered in fear, ran away, because he was not sexy in the least. He had a few boyfriends but never anything serious, and they all said he was too much of a stick in the mud to have fun.

But maybe Sonny was different, or Rafael was getting too drunk, because Rafael did not run away. He grabbed Sonny’s hips and held on.

“Like this,” Sonny said, his hips moving slowly and Rafael couldn’t believe he could. Maybe the man had past dance experience, or maybe it was all the practice he had from dance parties. Still, seeing it from across the room and feeling his hip bones under your thumbs were two very different sensations, and Rafael was hooked.

“You might do this,” Sonny added, running his fingers through Rafael’s hair, then wrapping his arms around Rafael’s neck. He pulled Rafael close, and Rafael was stuck up against him.

Not that he’d rather be anywhere else in the entire world.

Sonny swung his hips to the slow and easy beat, and Rafael was somehow able to keep up, thanks to Sonny’s leading. Because somehow Sonny was still leading with his arms around Rafael’s neck and Rafael’s hands on his hips.

And god, the song was sexy. Rafael lost himself in the lyrics, the sound, Sonny against him. He didn’t even care that there were dozens of people watching, a dozen other sweat bodies on the ‘dance floor’; all that mattered was Sonny in his arms.

“Can I do this?” Sonny asked, pushing himself impossibly closer to Rafael so their fronts were actually touching.

Was anyone else dancing this way? Rafael didn’t notice. All he saw was Sonny’s eyes against his when Sonny pressed his forehead against Rafael’s.

The repetition of the song didn’t bother Rafael when Sonny’s hips kept moving in the same circles over and over. The song seemed to last forever with the same lyrics and beat, and usually Rafael got tired of music like that after about a minute, but this time he cared not.

And then he was killed on that dance floor. Because Sonny winked, then spun in Rafael’s arms so his back was pressed against Rafael’s front. He kept swaying, kept dancing, but now his ass was pressed against Rafael’s groin. Rafael was shocked but pleased, Sonny pressing perfectly against him even through a layer of jeans and a plaid shirt tied around his waist.

Was anyone else practically fucking on the dance floor? Is that was dancing was? Rafael had no clue and no care to care, because Sonny’s body was freakin’ magnificent grinding against his.

He could get used to this, Rafael decided. Sonny against him, Sonny in his arms. He knew nothing about Sonny other than he was a sophomore at Harvard and loved to dance, apparently, but Rafael could see himself continuing their current state elsewhere, for a long time.

Rafael didn’t notice the song end, but eventually it did. Sonny ended it with a chaste kiss to Rafael’s eager lips.

“Want to get out of here?” Sonny whispered.

“Yes, please.”

Sonny grinned, then he grabbed Rafael’s hand and dragged him out of the house.

“I was wondering how many more people I had to dance with before you finally got the memo,” Sonny said as they walked away from the house, Sonny’s arm looped around his.

“I was waiting for the right moment,” Rafael said, because it sounded way cooler than, ‘until tonight, I was scared out of my mind’.

Sonny practically dragged him three blocks away to an apartment building where Rafael knew a lot of other law students lived. The only reason he didn’t live there was because it opened after he started four years ago.

“Wait, you live here?” Rafael asked.

Sonny was fishing keys out of his pocket. “Uh, yeah.”

“What’s your major?” Rafael asked next.

“Law. Why, what’s yours?”

Rafael’s mouth went a little more dry. Sonny was sexy and smart. How could Rafael be so lucky?

“Law,” Rafael replied.

Sonny grinned. “Really?” he asked, stepping up to Rafael. “This just got a little more fun.” He slung his arms around Rafael’s neck again.

Rafael grabbed his hips. “How?”

“I have a thing for hot guys,” Sonny said, “But I really have a thing for smart guys.”

Rafael gasped as Sonny kissed him, and it was then that he knew he was doomed. He had possibly no choice but to fall for Sonny.

Rafael kissed him back and thought there could be worse ways to spend his time at Harvard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Pony by Genuwine (1996). This song is ridiculous. 
> 
> Is dancing Sonny getting old...because honestly it keeps going. Maybe that’s the theme of this thread. Forget decades. It’s Sonny dancing.


	6. Single Ladies (00’s)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G
> 
> Additional tags: Break up, Reconciliation, Light Angst, BEYONCÉ

Rafael did have a track record of making poor decisions.

He had a series of good decisions: Harvard, where he lived, accepting a date or twenty with Sonny Carisi.

And then he made stupid decisions: work study, deciding to move into a brand new apartment building on campus that should’ve been tested out by others for a few years, and dumping Sonny Carisi.

Rafael didn’t know why, either. Everything was great with Sonny, perfect. They were beyond happy. They were twenty-something and in love.

And then Rafael got scared. And fear meant running, always. Running from bullies, running from New York, and then running from Sonny. Rafael told Sonny the one excuse he could, ‘they just didn’t fit’, and it was the biggest lie he’d ever told. They fit too well, fit too comfortably and Rafael wasn’t okay with that.

Rafael was doing his best to get over it. He removed all the photos of them together from his shelves and instead placed them in a book to look at later when he particularly hated himself. He deleted Sonny’s number from his cell phone. He stopped walking past Sonny’s apartment building on the way to class. He was going great, doing fine, until, of course, he ended up at the same bar as Sonny one Friday night.

Rafael walked in when Sonny was already seated at the bar with his buddies. Fellow big men on campus, not as smart as Sonny but up there, Rafael hated Sonny’s friends. He would’ve avoided them anyway, but especially when he spotted Sonny in the middle of the bustle.

Sonny was doing what he did best, basking under attention and making everyone laugh. He told the best stories, the best jokes, could match Rafael comeback for comeback, so every time there was a burst of laughter from down the bar, Rafael knew it was Sonny’s fault.

Rafael tried to complain when his friends decided they needed to sit near Sonny’s friends. A lot of Rafael’s friends were women, single women, and all of Sonny’s friends were single men. All, including Sonny.

Rafael didn’t love that, as Sonny was clearly the most desirable of the bunch, but at least his friends kept ex’s off limits.

Sonny’s friends were loud, and Rafael wondered if Sonny was the loudest or if his ears were pinpointing Sonny’s voice.

What was worse was Rafael kept hearing Sonny point out his relationship status.

“Well, since I’m newly single...“ he said, “Well, I was dumped, so...”

Rafael just rolled his eyes each and every time. He knew Sonny was just trying to get his attention. And sure, Rafael knew he made a stupid mistake by breaking up with Sonny. And sure, he was more than likely going to ask Sonny out again very soon because their separation was driving him crazy, but not in a noisy bar in front of their friends while Sonny was wasted.

The evening progressed. Sonny asked everyone to dance and a few people agreed, and Rafael just watched fuming from his spot.

And then something or another was said, Rafael didn’t really hear, but Sonny ended it with, “Well my ex is a pompous ass even though he’s from the projects who doesn’t know shit about relationships. All he knows is how to act better than everyone else when he’s no better himself.”

Insult Rafael? Fine, he could take it and he deserved it. But Sonny was just saying crap to get his attention. Well, he finally got it. Rafael had had enough.

Rafael got up and stalked over to where Sonny was swaying on a bar stool.

“You wanna talk?” Rafael asked, shoulders squared and ready for a fight.

“What, to you?” Sonny asked, snorting. “I was having a pleasant conversation with my friends—“

“Insulting me and my life. Get off your high horse, Sonny, you’re no better than me.”

“At least I’m not ashamed of where I come from. I didn’t run away from it like you run away from everything.”

Rafael rolled his eyes. “Forget it,” he said, “This is hopeless.” Sonny was drunk, not in his right mind, and Rafael was just mad now.

“Let’s talk, big man,” Sonny said, standing after Rafael and following him a few steps toward Rafael’s seat. “Tell me how you think I’m not good enough for you.”

Rafael spun around fast, right into Sonny’s face. “I never said that—“

“Tell me how lil’ ol’ me from Staten Island, who also got into fucking Harvard just like you, by the way, is somehow still not on your level.”

It was the exact opposite. Sonny was too good for him, to him. Rafael loved him too much, and Rafael was scared out of his mind.

“I never said—“

“No, you just said we don’t ‘fit’,” Sonny even used air-quotes around ‘fit’. “I know what that’s code for.”

“Clearly you don’t know—“

Suddenly, Sonny’s ears seemed to perk up and he grinned. “Hold that thought. This is my song.”

Rafael listened closely, trying to pick up the beat, but the lyrics began quickly and Rafael realized what it was.

Single Ladies.

“Let’s go, girls!” Sonny cried, grabbing the hands of two of Rafael’s friends and dragging them to the dance floor. Then, all of Rafael’s friends followed.

Rafael sighed. “Dios mio,” he muttered, returning to the bar. He watched from his seat as one of his friends taught Sonny a few moves from the popular music video that had just come out, and watched as Sonny laughed his head off and had the time of his life. A few months ago, Sonny had scoffed at the song, laughed, and now he was dancing away to it like the song was made for him.

And it was all Rafael’s fault.

He liked it. He should’ve put a ring on it, as Beyoncé was singing. He shouldn’t be mad that anyone else in the bar is looking at Sonny, that Sonny is making snide remarks. It’s all his fault.

Sonny was having fun, and maybe that’s what mattered. Still, Rafael would rather be having fun with Sonny, not fighting with Sonny.

Sonny smiled all through the song, then it ended and he stumbled back toward Rafael. He slid into the bar stool as his smile flipped to a frown.

“I hate that song,” Sonny said.

Rafael waved the bartender over and ordered Sonny a tall glass of ice water.

“You know how to take care of me, Rafi,” Sonny said. “That’s why I just don’t understand. You act like you care, but you don’t—“

Rafael stopped him instantly. “I do, Sonny. I do care.”

“Then why—“

Rafael couldn’t stop himself from blurting out, “Because I’m scared.”

Sonny slowly set the glass down. He took a deep breath.

“You broke up with me because you’re scared? Are you fucking kidding me?”

Rafael didn’t expect that. He didn’t know what he expected, really, just not...that. He opened his mouth to say something but closed it again.

“Jesus Christ, Rafi. You’re scared you buy a nightlight. You don’t dump someone.”

“Are there nightlights for relationships?”

Sonny snorted. “Well, no, but you at least talk to someone about it. My point is there’s a solution to the problem. An irreconcilable problem is, like, cheating or something. Fear is...fear is fixable. Weren’t you happy with me?”

“I am,” Rafael said, but quickly amended. “I...I was.”

“Then why was it so easy for you to walk away?”

Rafael rubbed his face. “I don’t know—“

“Listen,” Sonny said, turning to Rafael. “I’m scared too, okay? Any rightful person would be scared. What if it doesn’t work, what if you’re unhappy, what if I’m not enough? Normal people think these things, honey. But normal people also talk about it.”

“Am I not normal?” Rafael asked.

“Of course you’re not. You drink black coffee and hate cold pizza. You’re on a whole ‘nother level. Luckily, I am great at being normal and am willing to teach you.”

Rafael wanted to argue that Sonny was the most abnormally wonderful person he’d ever met. He wanted to argue that Sonny was so abnormal that he instantly stood out to Rafael the first time they met in a lecture full of a hundred other people. He wanted to argue that Sonny was so abnormal that Rafael constantly wanted to learn more about him and that’s why he was so enthralled in their relationship.

But Sonny grabbed his hand. “Don’t make me dance to Single Ladies at bars anymore.”

Rafael chuckled. “Will you give me another chance?”

Sonny threw his hands in the air. “I just said—“

Rafael surged forward and kissed him.

Sonny was smiling when he pulled away. “I freakin’ love you, Rafi. Don’t leave me again.”

“I couldn’t,” was all Rafael could say.

Sonny smiled. “Rafi?” he said, leaning close to Rafael again.

Rafael wanted another kiss. “Yeah?”

“I think I might throw up.”

Rafael pulled back instantly. “Come on,” he said, getting off his stool. “Let’s get you home.”

“Home,” Sonny agreed. “With you?”

Rafael wouldn’t dream of sending Sonny anywhere else. “Of course,” he said, holding Sonny close so he didn’t fall flat on the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Single Ladies by Beyoncé (2008)
> 
> Oh, Sonny and Rafael. So dramatic.


	7. Make Me Feel (Present)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rafael attempts to ask Sonny to a dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G
> 
> Additional tag: Developing Relationship, so much Fluff

Rafael saw Sonny opening his locker down the hall and took a long, deep breath. He was nervous, rightfully, because today was the day he was going to ask Sonny to the homecoming dance.

He wasn’t entirely sure what Sonny would say, hence the anxiety. He and Sonny were not complete strangers; they were in the same class first through fourth grade, but after that they were separated and drifted apart until high school, where they shared a few classes a year. The only problem was that Sonny was a jock, and popular, and so pretty that Rafael died every time he saw Sonny, and Rafael was pretty much just a dork who was on the debate team.

Still, Sonny was nice, very sweet, very funny, and always made Rafael laugh. Well, he was a class clown who made everyone laugh, but joy bloomed through Rafael’s chest every time Sonny said or did something funny. Awe ran through him every time Sonny said something ridiculously smart in any of their classes. And lust pulsed through him when Sonny did...pretty much anything.

Of course he didn’t love Sonny just because he was pretty. But pretty he very much was. Sonny had become a friend from being paired together on assignments or seated next to each other in classes, and though they didn’t hang out outside of school, or text each other, or generally speak any time outside of class, Rafael hoped there was more to the glances Sonny gave him, more to each time Sonny touched him, more to each smile or laugh in his direction. Rafael also hoped he wasn’t insane.

Rafael walked up to Sonny and hoped Sonny was ignoring him because he couldn’t see him. Sonny had the hood of his football sweatshirt on past where his peripheral vision would allow.

“Sonny?” Rafael asked.

Sonny didn’t budge. He continued switching books in and out of his backpack to locker.

“Sonny?” Rafael tried again, a bit louder.

Sonny still didn’t notice him.

Rafael was not to be deterred. He got this far.

He reached out to touch Sonny’s shoulder.

Sonny jumped. He pulled his hood back while pulling an earbud out of his ear.

“Jesus, Rafi...” Sonny let out a chuckle.

Rafael realized why Sonny was ignoring him and felt a little bit relieved. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were listening—“

“No, no, it’s okay! I didn’t see you there. I was wearing my hood so I don’t get my earbuds taken away again. This is my third set this year already!”

Rafael chuckled.

“What kind of music do you like, Rafi?”

Rafael’s stomach flipped at the use of his childhood nickname twice. “Uh, I don’t really—“

“What, you don’t like music? You insane?! Here, listen...” Sonny pushed an earbud into Rafael’s ear.

A beat filled Rafael’s ear that he didn’t recognize. It was a modern pop song with a lot of different sounds and a woman’s voice singing about love. Rafael liked it. It had a good, easy sound. But what he liked more was Sonny’s face.

He had closed his eyes, had a huge smile, and was swaying to the beat and moving his arms in a nice little dance. He looked so happy.

The song was suddenly Rafael’s favorite song.

“Dominick!” Rafael suddenly heard from next to them, snapping him out of his trance of watching Sonny.

Sonny jumped and pulled the other earbud from his ear. “Oh, uh, Mr. Smith—“

Mr. Smith, their math teacher, simply held out his hand.

Rafael was more liked by Mr. Smith, for the reason that he took math seriously and Sonny acted like a clown in math.

Sonny sighed and unplugged the earbuds out of his phone.

“Mr. Smith?” Rafael said. “They’re mine. Sonny wanted me to hear a song for our next class. He doesn’t have earbuds with him.”

Mr. Smith raised an eyebrow. “That true, Dominick?”

Sonny nodded. “Yes, sir. Sorry for getting your earbuds taken, Rafi—“

Mr. Smith sighed. “Look, I’ll give you a warning this time, Rafael. Don’t let me see them again.”

Rafael nodded. “Yes, sir.”

Mr. Smith nodded curtly and continued down the hall.

Sonny let out a sigh of relief. “Thanks, Raf. I owe you one. My ma woulda killed me if I’d lost another pair.” He rolled up the earbuds and placed them in his locked before shutting it.

“No problem,” Rafael said. “Honestly, I was in shock remembering your name is Dominick.”

Sonny turned fully to Rafael again. “God, I know, right? I almost didn’t respond.”

Rafael laughed.

“So,” Sonny said, “What’s up, Raf? Did you need something, or...not that I mind talking to you...I like to...I mean...”

Rafael tried to control his face and not smile and Sonny’s adorably flustered rambling. He also tried not to wonder if Sonny was—for some reason—nervous talking to him, too.

“Oh, I...” Rafael took a deep breath. “I was wondering if...if you have a date to homecoming yet.”

Sonny’s lip twitched. “No, I don’t.”

“Oh, uh...” Rafael looked down at his feet and kicked one on the floor. “Do...do you want to...”

He heard Sonny chuckle. Rafael thought Sonny was laughing at him.

“Do you want me to ask?” Sonny asked next.

Rafael looked up at his face. Sonny had a giant, soft grin.

“What?” Rafael asked.

“Do you want me to ask you?”

“Wait...you want to go...with...”

Sonny laughed. “God, you can’t even get that out? Fine. Rafi, you wanna go to homecoming with me? Please?”

“You actually want to go with me?” Rafael asked.

“I’m the one who asked, didn’t I?”

Rafael couldn’t believe it. He blinked at Sonny; that’s all he could get his body to do.

Sonny waved a hand in front of Rafael’s face. “You there?”

Rafael nodded.

Sonny was still grinning. “Okay, well, since you were attempting to ask first, I’ll assume this is a yes, right?”

Rafael nodded again.

“Great,” Sonny continued. “I’ll pick you up Saturday night at 6, okay?”

Rafael nodded a third time, still staring into Sonny’s wonderfully bright eyes.

“Okay,” Sonny said, right as the warning bell rang for them to get to class. “I’ll see you later,” he said.

Then he stopped Rafael’s heart. He leaned in and kissed Rafael’s cheek.

Rafael’s cheek tingled for the rest of the day.

* * *

 

Saturday night rolled around and Rafael was ready to throw up. Dressed in his nice suit and a blue tie, he waited for Sonny to arrive at his house so they could go to the dance. Rafael’s mother was thrilled, saying over and over that she couldn’t believe Rafael was going to a dance with little Sonny from down the street, the one who used to eat dirt because the older boys dared him and he wanted to make people laugh. The little Sonny who used to cry for his mom if he spent more than two hours at the Barba house in one afternoon.

Finally, the little Sonny arrived, and Lucia made a huge fuss over them. Rafael was embarrassed, but more than that he was just happy that Sonny was even there. That he was going to a dance with Sonny.

After taking tons of pictures for Lucia, they left the house and got into Sonny’s mom’s Jetta.

As soon as the car was on, Sonny plugged in his cell phone to play music.

“You never told me what kind of music you like,” Sonny commented.

“Oh,” Rafael responded. “I don’t really have a preference. Whatever is fine.” He wasn’t sure if so soon in whatever this was was a good time to tell Sonny he pretty much only listened to show-tunes.

Sonny grew a contemplative look as he scrolled, then settled on a song Rafael didn’t recognize. It was a decent song, so Rafael didn’t mind.

The next song that started was the one that Sonny was listening to when Rafael attempted to ask him to the dance. Rafael instantly recognized it because he was sure he would forever.

Sonny hummed to the beat and tapped on the steering wheel for the rest of the ride. The school wasn’t far away, but he was quiet, and Rafael hoped it wasn’t a prequel to the rest of their evening. He hoped things between the two of them weren’t awkward.

Rafael just listened to the singer sing about feeling a certain way about another person. Feeling good about them, clearly passionate and strongly by the other lyrics.

Sonny parked the car and turned it off as the song ended.

Then, he turned to Rafael.

“Can I tell you something?”

Rafael nodded.

“That song is, like, my favorite song right now. It’s just a feel good song about...liking someone, you know?”

Rafael nodded again. He wondered not for the first time what it was about Sonny that made him unable to speak.

Sonny licked his lips and looked nervous. “So, like, I don’t know...it’s just that...every time I listen to that song—which is really often because I love it—I...think of you.”

Rafael’s heart stopped. “What?”

Sonny covered his face. “Oh god, now I just sound like an idiot, don’t I? Fuck.”

“No, no,” Rafael offered. “You definitely don’t sound like an idiot. I was just surprised. I didn’t know you felt...any way about me, honestly.”

“What?” Sonny lowered his hand. “Are you kidding? You’re, like, the smartest guy in our whole grade. And you’re, like, super hot.”

Rafael snorted. “Okay, I don’t know about that—“

“You’re kidding. You seriously wear, like, your tight t-shirts and have no idea what you do to me?”

“To you?” Rafael asked. “And they’re tight because they’re too small—“

“Hey, no, don’t do that. You’re seriously so hot.”

Rafael looked into Sonny’s face. Sonny looked so honest.

“You’re serious?” Rafael asked, still not believing him.

“I’m serious,” Sonny said.

Rafael cracked a smile.

“And now you’re wearing a suit, and I just...” Sonny looked down Rafael’s torso and bit his lip.

Rafael couldn’t believe it. A few days ago he wasn’t even sure Sonny would agree to go to the dance with him, and now Sonny was making a face at him that looked like he wanted to eat him alive.

“You make me feel...really good, Rafi. I like you, I like being around you. I like everything about you. I was wondering how many more longing looks I had to give you before you asked me out. I’m really glad you tried to ask me to this dance.” He smirked.

Rafael caught the joke at the end and he laughed. “Well,” he said, “I really like you, too.”

Rafael realized too late that Sonny just said ‘like’ and Rafael said ‘really like’.

“Really like?” Sonny asked, obviously teasing Rafael.

“Oh, no, I just meant—“

“You said it, you can’t take it back!”

With that, Sonny quickly hopped out of the car to end the discussion.

It took Rafael a second to come to his senses and climb out of the car after Sonny, then a few more to catch up with him and his ridiculously long legs. But when he did, he fell into an easy step next to Sonny.

Before they got to the steps to the gym, Sonny reached between them and grabbed Rafael’s hand. Rafael’s skin seemed to burn where Sonny touched him, and it felt so good.

“Hey,” Sonny said as Rafael reached for the door. “Hang on. You’re missing something.”

Rafael looked at him. “What?” he asked, confused.

Sonny leaned in, and Rafael was ready for a sweet kiss on his cheek. But instead, Sonny pressed a very quick kiss to his lips.

Sonny smiled widely after the smack. “There. Complete.”

Rafael felt like his soul left his body. He was stunned and couldn’t believe that Sonny had just kissed him so easily. Rafael was sure nothing in his life had ever felt as good as Sonny’s kiss, and he was sure nothing would ever feel as wonderful again.

Rafael must have just been staring at Sonny, so Sonny waved a hand in front of Rafael’s face.

“You there?” he asked.

Rafael nodded.

“Is this going to happen any time I do...anything?”

“I hope so.”

Sonny smiled. Then, he led Rafael into the dance.

That night, Rafael was the happiest he’d ever been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Make Me Feel by Janelle Monáe (2018)
> 
> That completes it! Thank you for going along with this, the comments, the kudos. I hope you enjoyed. I hope my teen au/song fics are not getting annoying. Thanks for reading!


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